Niko

"When I was your age, 16 or 17, I didn't walk with the Lord at all. I grew up in a Christian family but I didn't live that. I started to do drugs. In the beginning it was small stuff like marijuana. Later it got into Crystal meth. I had to finance this life so I began to deal drugs. I lost my apprenticeship twice.

While growing up, people put a label on me: I wasnt good enough, I wasn't athletic enough, I wasn't acceptable. Strangely the guys I did drugs with accepted me. I was good at selling drugs. Life got harder for me and I started to have problems. I was in trouble with the cops. I was depressed. I had problems with my friends. I had psychological problems. Everything was being destroyed in my life. I was really addicted to drugs.

I realized I totally destroyed my life and I was only 21. I really just came to a desperate place. I heard a voice say Nikolai, I can help you. I can change your life. You need to come to me. I just ignored this. I thought it was from the drugs, but it wouldn't go away. This voice was telling me "I can get you out." I got down on my knees and said, "God, if you are real, change my life."

At this point in my life I only knew drug dealers. I didn't have any good contacts. I didn't have much contact with my parents. It was pretty hard for me to "jump off the train" and get some good influences.

I prayed and a few weeks later my mom called me and said "Niko. I have a friend in Israel. You can go there and work there and get some distance." It was totally weird and crazy. My mom had no idea of my prayer. I told nobody.

If she asked me a few weeks earlier I would have said No way, all my friend lived here. I got to go to Israel. I got great teaching and counseling from the guy I lived with. He shared great scriptures with me. I began to recover.

I received a letter about my case and they closed the case which never happens. I learned through looking back that the devil tried to put a wrong image on me. He tried to maker me believe I an unworthy, not good enough. Since I surrendered my life, He had given me gifts I didn't even know about like speaking in front of a group. I went on a discipleship training school and worked as a youth pastor for two years and then came back to YWAM. There have been challenges since I came here but as a Christian I have had no regrets serving God. I mean, I have nothing basically, but God provides. How many people get to live in a castle?